I must say that I'm pretty good at creating and sustaining a mess. Like, I'm the best. Seriously. So for all of my OCD friends out there who just cannot grasp how I can live like this, here's the step-by-step instructions. And, just because I love you, I've broken it down into sections (and assuming it's a work day). You're welcome.
MORNING:
- Wake up to your alarm clock and wallow around in your bed like a beached whale. Once you finally accept the fact that you have to get up, just get up. Don't worry about making the bed.
- Before showering, take your clothes off and throw them in the floor beside the dirty clothes hamper. It just makes sense.
- Splash as much water as possible while brushing your teeth
- Leave all of your makeup on the counter rather than putting it in its proper place. You don't have time for all of that!
- You cannot find the camisole you want to wear under today's outfit of choice and there's not enough time to thoroughly look for it so you just have to discard the outfit and put on another. By discard, I mean take it off and see where it lands. You'll get it later. ;)
EVENING:
- You just can't wait to get out of your work clothes and into something with an elastic waist band. Again, just leave those clothes on the floor. You'll get them later.
- Use every ingredient and dish possible when making dinner. Don't worry about cleaning as you go. You'll probably have to re-use something at some point and you don't want to have to double back.
- You're exhausted after dinner and don't feel like putting everything up. You've worked hard today and need some downtime. Just leave everything where you left it. You'll get it before you go to bed. You promise.
- Someone has shot you with a tranquilizer gun, and it's time for bed. You have a fleeting feeling of guilt for not picking up all of the stuff you told yourself you would, but the feeling passes quickly. Maybe tomorrow.
Repeat this cycle for exactly one work-week and the results will start piling up. (Pun intended.)
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